


Shark Bite Scars

by FrizzleNox



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alexis Rose up to no good, Childhood Stories, Dramatic David Rose, M/M, POV Patrick Brewer, Sharks, shark week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:14:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25924987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrizzleNox/pseuds/FrizzleNox
Summary: “Patrick was skeptical of David’s story. His husband could be stubborn sometimes, this was beyond his normal stubbornness. He FaceTimed Alexis, suspecting that she’d been involved in whatever had caused the scar on David’s foot.”
Relationships: Alexis Rose & David Rose, Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 9
Kudos: 55
Collections: Rose Apothecary Shark Fest





	Shark Bite Scars

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my Rose Apothecary friends for the inspiration and the sprints.
> 
> Inspired by the picture floating around of DL floating at the lake.

“David, what do you mean you can’t swim?” Patrick asked his husband, shocked.

They’d just gotten off the phone with the Brewers who had invited them to join them for a week at the cottage they were renting on Lake Ontario. Patrick had been excited to take David to a place where he’d spent many childhood summers. David wasn’t as enthusiastic.

“I’m shocked Alexis didn’t tell you the story about how she tried to kill me as a child.” Patrick rolled his eyes, His husband could be overdramatic.

“No, she didn’t.”

“When I was like 10 or 11 she was obsessed with Jaws. Something about cute sailors or something, and she made me watch it.” 

Patrick nodded “Yeah, it’s a great film.”

“Well, it scared me.”

“David, there are no sharks at the lake. There are no sharks in Canada. You have nothing to be afraid of.”

“There are sharks. I got attacked by one at the lake when I was 13 or 14.”

Patrick rolled his eyes.

“I’m serious. It’s how I got that stupid scar on my foot.” Patrick had noticed the scar, the faint red line that wrapped around the arch of his left foot, onto the top, ending near his second toe, but had never asked about it. 

“Sharks take chunks, I’ve seen shark bite scars, if you’d be bitten by one, you’d be missing part of that foot.”

David shook his head. “Patrick, it was a fucking shark. I have the scar to prove it.”

Patrick was skeptical of David's story. His husband could be stubborn sometimes, this was beyond his normal stubbornness. He FaceTimed Alexis, suspecting that she’d been involved in whatever had caused the scar on David’s foot.

“Button! How are you? I’ve been meaning to call you.” She was in her apartment, from what he could see.

“Alexis, what did you do to David?”

“What, when, nothing.”

“Sharks,” Patrick said firmly, hoping to jog her memory.

Patrick heard Alexis laugh. “Is he still scared of the water? That was like 20 years ago.”

“What did you do to him, Alexis?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“Alexis you were there when I got bit by a shark.” David joined Patrick on camera.

“Hi, David! How’s my favorite brother?” Alexis gave her brother a two-eyed wink, trying to smooth things over.

“Alexis, what did you do.”

“She tried to kill me,” David interjected.

“Hush David, I did not.”

“Eat glass!”

“Alexis.” Patrick loved his husband and his sister in law, but their bickering drove him crazy sometimes.

“So I may have paid my friend some money to strap a shark fin to his head and swim-up behind David and grab his ankle.”

“That was a real shark, I was bleeding.” David protested.

“No, it was Eric, my friend, you were bleeding because you insisted on going in the lake without water shoes, You panicked and sliced your foot on a zebra mussel.”

“You know water shoes don’t fit my aesthetic, I’d never sliced my foot before.” Patrick stifled a laugh. His husband had been particular about his style since his young age. 

“You got scared and you sliced your foot David, and you had to get stitches.” Alexis reminded him. “Remember Mom and Dad were pissed. You ruined our vacation and you got blood in the Mercedes.”

Patrick let out a laugh. His family vacations had been nothing like the Roses. David swatted at him. 

“I hate both of you right now.” David groaned. He was embarrassed by the story.

“So anyway Patrick, David wouldn’t go in the water on vacations ever since.”

“Thanks, Alexis, that explains a lot.” 

“Anytime Button! Bye, David.” She waved at the camera. Patrick hung up.

“She’s a monster.” David groaned.

Patrick shook his head. He knew that things had gotten better between David and Alexis over the years. They’d routinely gotten into screaming matches that resulted in them not talking to each other for weeks growing up. Thankfully, things had gotten better once they’d moved to Schitt’s Creek from what he’d been told. 

“You know, David. This whole fear of the water is making me rethink saying yes to my parents earlier.”

“Your idea of going camping for a week is not a vacation.”

“We’re not going camping. The cottage has running water and electricity. They’re only going for the first half the week so we’ll have a few days all to ourselves. My mom promised she’d cook for you while we’re there.”

David pouted. 

“I’m really looking forward to floating on the lake with you, day drinking. Watching the sunset. Skinny dipping under the stars.” Patrick paused for a moment. “But if you don’t want to go, I can just go by myself.”

“I hate your ultimatums.” David sighed. He loved the Brewers. He hadn’t gotten to spend much time with his inlaws, and a few days relaxing with them, hearing stories of Patrick’s childhood, eating Marcy’s cooking did sound rather nice.

“Should I tell my mom you’re not coming.”

“You know I can’t turn your family down.”

“Good.” Patrick pressed a kiss to his husband’s cheek. “I’ll order you some water shoes.”

“I will not.” David started to protest.

“You will wear them, I’ll find you a high-end pair.” Patrick promised. “I’m not risking another shark bite this trip.”

**Author's Note:**

> High-End watershoes are stupidly hard to find. They don't really exist. [These](https://www.saksfifthavenue.com/swims-breeze-wave-water-loafers/product/0400012082083) are what I imagine David ends up with. Thanks to Olive for helping me find them.


End file.
